Californian lazy week continues

As predicted by our mothers, Combat! blog continues to wallow in the lazy California air, gradually losing all interest in politics, culture, physical motion and everything else besides finding the exact right combination of sunbeam and gentle breeze. While we continue to do nothing, haphazardly, how about you read this terrifying speculation on Sarah Palin’s presidential future, courtesy of Frank Rich. It’s probably nothing to worry about. The American people would never vote for an attractive woman who panders to their sense of anti-intellectual solidarity. Especially if she were running against a black guy who went to Harvard. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to make plans to eventually think about going to maybe get a cup of coffee.

Combat! blog flies through air, isn’t useful

Combat! blog is flying to Los Angeles today, in order to observe Thanksgiving as the pilgrims intended. As part of this arrangement, will I have to pass through a machine that shows a high school graduate a picture of my dick? You betcha, although maybe I can negotiate for one of those special pat-downs. (All right—”special pats-down.” Are you happy? I’m not happy.) We’ll be back tomorrow, shortly before disappearing again for Thanksgiving/ever. In the meantime, enjoy this rock jam. It’s delightful.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUlrkstmTfE

Sarah Palin, ironist

Sarah Palin does her impression of Alaska.

It’s been a while since we’ve discussed the perambulations of Sarah Palin through the American psyche, maybe because she seems to be fading, just a little, into the background insanity of contemporary discourse. Whenever someone brings her up I’m filled with fear and resentment, sure, but lately it’s rare that I find myself thinking about her on my own. She hasn’t made up a word or a fact about pending policy decisions in like ten weeks, and I almost started to forget about her. That’s exactly the kind of thing that at least one multimillion-dollar organization is designed to prevent, and now that the midterms are over, Sarah Palin has come roaring back. The original plan was to have her say “cunt” on national television—possibly to Gwen Ifill—but instead she wrote a book. And based on the passages leaked to Gawker and The Daily Beast, it’s a goddamn masterpiece of irony.

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Friday links! Satisfactions of elitism edition

Now that the nation has been conveniently divided into Real Americans and everyone I know, and now that the former group has run proud and jiggling through the finish tape of electoral democracy, it’s time to face facts: elitism is cool again. Arch misanthropy is cool again. Sarcastically agreeing with the ignorant might even be cool again. It must be, because such people appear to be winning. What makes elitism uncool is that the elitist is—by definition if not in contemporary practice—winning. Making fun of the dumb and inexpert therefore looks an awful lot like gloating. There’s only one time when elitism is cool, and that’s when general stupidity attains such a supermajority that it overcomes its natural limitations and starts running society. Friends, now is one such historical moment. The retiring middle class and the sons of congressmen have wrested government from the insiders who run Washington, wrested discourse from the nebbishes who spend all day following the news, and wrested history from the eggheads who wasted years learning about it. They had TV already, so that’s pretty much everything. The people have spoken, and they have chosen themselves and/or whomever can convincingly mimic them as the wisest members of society. We humble minority will have to obey them, but we are allowed to make fun. Once you’re losing, that’s your prize. Won’t you snipe bitterly with me?

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Trident commercial lays out worst argument in sales history

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kG2MuOyrCrQ

The fanciful commercial above is for Trident Layers, a chewing gum that contains a layer of mouthwash or food coloring or industrial epoxy or something in the middle. The candy industry is a fresh, minty mystery to me, but I assume now is not a great time to try to sell a new kind of gum to adults. Perhaps for that reason, Trident has broken the standards set by Juicy Fruit* and Doublemint** to go with something funny—sorry, “funny.” Like many commercials, this one is essentially a comedy sketch. Unlike many commercials, it is predicated on the viewer believing that the product being sold is not worth the money.

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