Combat! blog endorses Ted Cruz for president, because why not?

By Dan Brooks in Republican Candidates 1 Comment
Cruisin'

Cruisin’

As we enter the final 18 months before the 2016 election, it’s high time Combat! blog endorsed a candidate for president. That candidate is Ted Cruz. Sure, we disagree with most of his political positions and all of his musical ones. But he has the three qualities this blog looks for in a candidate: 1) He is 15% worse at lying than he thinks he is. 2) He is neither a Bush nor a Clinton. 3) He has almost no chance of becoming president. That last element is crucial to our endorsement. We are proud to endorse Candidate Cruz, because we are confident that we will never have to answer for anything President Cruz might do. He clinched the Combat! blog endorsement with this poll.

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Should Beyoncé make us drink Pepsi?

By Dan Brooks in Existential Dilemmas 8 Comments
Pop star Beyoncé Knowles as literal mouthpiece

Pop star Beyoncé Knowles as literal mouthpiece

The aforementioned Mark Bittman—whose beans and greens recipe came out great last night, by the way—has used his Times column to call out Beyoncé for endorsing Pepsi. His intentionally provocative contention is that one day we will view sugary sodas as comparable to cigarettes in their impact on public health. Quote:

From saying, as she once did in referring to [Michelle Obama’s fitness initiative] Let’s Move, that she was “excited to be part of this effort that addresses a public health crisis,” she’s become part of an effort that promotes a public health crisis. I suppose it would be one thing if she needed the money or the exposure but she and Jay-Z are worth around $775 million.

Since we’re a bunch of grizzled old ethicists around here, I thought we might take up the question: Is it wrong for Beyoncé to sell her endorsement to Pepsi?

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Perry leaves race, endorses Gingrich

By Dan Brooks in Republican Candidates 1 Comment

"Is he the fat one? Yeah, what the fuck."

It was a classic story of the cruelty implicit in the American dream: Rick Perry, born son of struggling ranchers and once a serious contender for President, is now reduced to being the millionaire governor of Texas. His meteoric rise A) lasted about a week and B) only made his fall more vertiginous—and all for the simple crime of never knowing what he was doing. Perry has formally withdrawn his candidacy for the Republican nomination and, in one last act of electoral incompetence, instructed his followers to support Newt Gingrich. That’s like your dog running away and, as he goes, suggesting that you play fetch with the microwave. In a completely unrelated story, it turns out that Rick Santorum actually won Iowa.

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