A housekeeping day at Combat! blog

By Dan Brooks in Uncategorized 1 Comment
Prisma, what have you done?

Prisma, what have you done?

Astute readers may have noticed there was no Combat! blog yesterday. I was all set to write a short post linking to my column in the Independent, having just returned from an unusually hot yoga. I took a shower. I sent some emails. I realized I had eaten naught but a donut all day so, nutritionist that I am, I made an extra-large smoothie based on 16 ounces of orange juice, plus a bunch of wheatgrass and spinach. Thank goodness for the bananas, or vomit would have propelled me around the apartment like a deflating balloon. As it was, I just felt kind of nauseous, and I lay down for a second to collect myself. Two hours later, I woke up just in time to go to dinner with my girlfriend.

So I missed Combat! blog, and for that I am sorry. I’m also sorry I went calorie-negative during a five-workout week, because I still feel kind of washed out and bleary. There will be no Friday links, because I am taking a mental/physical health day. Here’s this week’s Indy column to amuse you while I consume coconut water, avocados, and wild rice. Inspired by Attempt’s comment yesterday, I’ve also added a random post widget to the sidebar on the left. It should be different every time you load the page, so just keeping hanging out on Combat! blog, hitting refresh, until you see a headline that piques your interest. Then go to that page and hit refresh a few thousand times, too. We’ll all be rich before we know it.

Trump says “jive” instead of “jibe,” embarrassing self, also calls on Russia to hack Clinton again

By Dan Brooks in Uncategorized 2 Comments
"My fellow Americans: Ain't I a stinker?"

“My fellow Americans: ain’t I a stinker?”

Appearing on MSNBC’s Morning Joe today with, we can only assume, another guy named Joe, Vice President Biden said Donald Trump “knows nothing about foreign policy, nor should he, based on his background.” On the Today show, which Joe Morning will take over in the event Matt Lauer dies, President Obama warned the billionaire could still become president. But Trump’s campaign is dead in the water as of this morning, when he made a terrible gaffe in his press conference. Quote:

[Obama is] the most ignorant president in our history. His views of the world, as he says, don’t jive, and the world is a mess.

Jibe: a verb meaning to be in accord with, to agree. Jive: noun, a form of slang associated with black American jazz musicians, or verb, to taunt or sneer at. He might as well have said “for all intensive purposes.” Trump is sure to catch a lot of jiving after people hear his malapropism, in the next few days before he officially withdraws from the race. Oh, before I forget, he also said Russia should find Hillary Clinton’s missing emails. Video, sweet video, after the jump.

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As Sanders concedes, Democrats declare crying Robin Hood crying Peter Pan

By Dan Brooks in 2016 Election 0 Comment
Delegate Sean Kehren, known to the internet as Crying Peter Pan, in his Robin Hood hat

Sean Kehren, known to the internet as Crying Peter Pan, in his Robin Hood hat

The Democratic Party came together last night in Philadelphia, if not in camaraderie. In the end, Vermont senator and beautiful dream Bernie Sanders urged his supporters to elect Hillary Clinton, as we knew he must. But it took some wailing and gnashing of teeth. The delegation from California booed near continuously, and chants of “we trusted you” became audible over Elizabeth Warren. Ostensible show-woman Sarah Silverman lost control of the crowd when told to stretch it out before Paul Simon, first telling the audience she’d been instructed to kill time and then refusing to join Al Franken’s attempts at jokes. Hot-takers loved her remark that Bernie-or-bust rowdies were “acting ridiculous,” but the night’s most affecting moments were in the reaction shots. A lot of Bernie delegates cried during his speech, including the man pictured above, whom the internet has dubbed Crying Peter Pan. In fact, that’s a Robin Hood hat, which he wore to symbolize the proposed “Robin Hood tax” on Wall Street. Delegate Sean Kehren also informs Liz Goodwin that he was crying because he was moved by Bernie’s call for unity, not because he was sad his candidate lost. Is there any better metaphor for the 2016 Democratic nominating process than misidentifying Robin Hood as Peter Pan?

Fix in, chairwoman out, planned unity off as Democrats convene in Philadelphia

By Dan Brooks in 2016 Election 1 Comment
Thanks, Prisma!

Thanks, Prisma!

Remember when Ted Cruz, John Kasich, and Donald Trump were going to divide the Republican Party amongst themselves? Remember when we worried aloud, biting our cheeks to keep from snickering, that the GOP would suffer a contested convention? Here’s video from the first day of the Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia, in which delegates boo their nominee:

The DNC was in the news this weekend, starting Friday afternoon, when Wikileaks published over 20,000 emails proving party leaders connived against the Sanders campaign. The leaks probably came from Russian hackers, who likely dumped the information to sow division among Democrats and abet Kremlin favorite Donald Trump. That’s what the panicked faithful said, anyway. On Sunday, Debbie Wasserman Schultz resigned as chair of the DNC. She promised to gavel the convention to order and oversee its proceedings, but after delegates from her home state met her with jeers at breakfast, she withdrew. Now the party is without a master, and Hillary’s power to command loyalty among Democrats is compromised on the eve of her ascension. Oh yeah—and Trump pulled even with her in the polls.

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Friday links! Oh good, ethnic nationalism edition

By Dan Brooks in 2016 Election 2 Comments
Yeah, it looks like we're doing this.

Yeah, it looks like we’re doing this.

Donald Trump spoke for 75 minutes at the Republican National Convention last night, alternately aggrandizing himself, predicting doom, and assuring us he’d fix it. The theme of the evening was Make America One Again, which was a refreshing change from Monday’s theme, Make America Scared of Brown People. Yet Trump seemed to double down on separation. He adjusted his promised ban on Muslims to a ban on people from countries Muslim terrorists have “penetrated.” He did not mention any black lives that may have mattered, but he presented cop killing as epidemic, even though fewer officers have been murdered during the Obama administration than during any administration in the last 30 years. Then Trump promised to “end crime and violence very soon.” Today is Friday, and the Republican Party has nominated for president of the United States an ethnic nationalist campaigning on law and order. Won’t you consider fixing up the attic with me?

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