Friday links! Hacky McHack jokes edition

By Dan Brooks in Friday Links, Uncategorized 0 Comment
Yes, but my ideas will be dimly remembered Anchorman jokes.

Yes, but my ideas will be dimly remembered Anchorman jokes.

The UK National Environmental Research Council’s has closed its online poll to choose a name for its new polar research vessel, and the winner is Boaty McBoatface. That name beat out Shackleton, Endeavor, and David Attenborough by a landslide, because it’s a hilarious joke. See, it’s a boat, so the name “Boaty” is fatuous. And “Mc” is a common component of names, while “-face” is not and therefore a comically inept/lazy construction. Boaty McBoatface us the “insert witty comment here” of gag names: it never gets old, no matter how many times you see it. That’s why this blog is called “Bloggy McBlogface” now, and when I put in for a table at brunch I tell them my name is “Diney McDinerton,” and I call my car “Carface O’Kelly”—just to give everyone a good, hearty laugh. Today is Friday, and I’m not worried about the effect of democracy on ship-naming so much as on joke construction. Won’t you despise the vulgarity of the mob with me?

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Friday links! Other people working edition

By Dan Brooks in Friday Links 3 Comments
The author, who from an early age loved to watch other people work—photo by Suzan Brooks

The author, who from an early age loved to watch other people work—photo by Suzan Brooks

Is there anything more satisfying than hard work? Can any force build a stronger character than honest labor daily undertaken? Work nourishes the soul—not my soul, of course, but the souls of others. In these times of national struggle, the only clear way forward is for other people to roll up their sleeves, take hold of their bootstraps and, with whatever hands remain available, get to work. I am prepared to do whatever it takes to teach other people the value of work, whether that means opposing welfare or cutting my own taxes. Today is Friday, and honest labor sets everyone free except me. Won’t you rediscover the joys of work by yourself?

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Friday links! Fourth estate edition

By Dan Brooks in Uncategorized 3 Comments
Proof that CNN is white

Proof that CNN is white

Maybe I just spent all week with cops urging me to end the violence by lying on the ground, but I am a little worried about what wags call the cult of compliance. More than our courts, it is our psychological relation to the police that determines how free we are. Fortunately, America has a robust and principled media that relentlessly asserts the rights of the citizen against powerful forces. And I have these vast, leathery wings, which allow me to buffet people or, if necessary, fly away. So I don’t need a vigorous public discourse to prevent my democracy from collapsing into a police state. Today is Saturday, and ifs and buts have become, without our really doing anything, candy and nuts. Won’t you join the truth telling contest with me?

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Friday links! Securitocracy edition

By Dan Brooks in Friday Links 0 Comment
NSA headquarters, which does not look arrogant or evil at all

NSA headquarters, which does not look arrogant or evil at all

Imagine that you are a wealthy member of one of the two parties that control the richest nation in the history of the world, or you run one of the corporations that made it rich, or you’re one of the people who work for those corporations or political parties to feed your family. America is doing great, but everyone also seems to agree that it is doing worse lately and is possibly about to stop doing great forever. Meanwhile, religious hillbillies on the other side of Earth have vowed to come here and randomly explode, plus an unknown but growing number of Americans have less incentive to support the status quo because present conditions benefit you much more than them. You are winning this game, but the game is almost over. If you were such a person, you might understandably organize your politics and your worldview around one central question: how can I keep anything from changing? What you need is security—order-maintaining, threat-identifying, future-avoiding security. Today is Friday, and anything different is necessarily bad for us. Won’t you arrest the progress of history with me?

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Friday links! Passionate intensity edition

By Dan Brooks in Friday Links 0 Comment
Action Bronson, best and worst, unconvicted and full of passionate intensity

Action Bronson, best and worst, unconvicted and full of passionate intensity

The best lack all conviction, William Butler Yeats wrote in “The Second Coming,” while the worst are full of passionate intensity. He was talking about postwar Europe, but he might as well have described the world we would inherit a century later. Probably, Yeats’s claim is always true. You don’t get to be the worst without great confidence in what you’re doing, and the same qualities that makes the best better encourage them to doubt themselves. Today is Friday, and jerks continue to operate without a moment’s doubt. Won’t you waver along with me?

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