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An extremely exciting day in the history of boring stuff

By Dan Brooks in Politics versus Government January 22, 2013 1 Comment

The US Senate looks the same every time.

I still remember the day that I, a boy-child of 14, encountered Robert’s Rules of Order. Oh, I though to myself. Here is finally the thing I like least in the world. As a set of rules for meetings, parliamentary procedure is boring squared. Even in the most interesting kinds of meetings—the Machiavellian ones where everyone pretends not to hate one another’s goals—procedure is at best a synopsis of a plot. It is therefore maybe hard to get psyched about the possibility of today’s Senate changing the rules of the filibuster, an instrument that the world’s greatest deliberative body abuses now more than ever.

Friday links! All fake everything edition

By Dan Brooks in Friday Links January 18, 2013 1 Comment

Fake.

As any teenager will tell you, everything is fake. News events, music, your parents’ love, X-Ray Specs: it’s all one big, cynical manipulation, and the only way to fight it is by not believing anything—in other words, with more cynicism. The cynic never looks stupid. The person who once believed and has been proven wrong is an idiot, but the skeptic who is eventually convinced is circumspect. Cynicism is skepticism diligently applied, and so it follows that you should assume everyone is lying all the time. Fortunately, we have the internet to train us. Today is Friday, and the news is full of lies, hoaxes and fakery. Even the accusations of faking are lies. It’s a bold new world, and we do not have to accept any of it as actual. Won’t you issue a blanket denial with me?

I feel good about this thing I wrote for the Indy

By Dan Brooks in Uncategorized January 17, 2013 2 Comments

And I feel great about this picture of Denny Rehberg, courtesy of Steele Williams.

I do not feel good about my ability to meet today’s deadlines, and I was awaked at 3:15 by my neighbor’s favorite album, Repetitive Bassline Jams 4. So instead of reading my stupid opinions in this blog, how about you read MSOs in this week’s column for the Missoula Independent? It’s about Dennis Rehberg, our erstwhile congressman who lost his bid for the Senate in November and subsequently complained that Montana voters “bitch and moan” without ever changing anything. He is a rascal. He is also likely to become a lobbyist, so we shouldn’t feel too bad about losing his public persona. Teaser: on a diplomatic visit to Kazakhstan, he called the locals “coneheads” and fell off a horse. Rumors that he drank a dozen shots of vodka first are not substantiated.

NRA ad demands armed guards in schools

By Dan Brooks in Rhetoric January 16, 2013 7 Comments

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=miSjgv1MH7s

The title of this advertisement—Stand and Fight—really demonstrates how a gun can recontextualize things. Stand and fight… is a stirring phrase when it’s followed by for what’s right or against injustice or for your right to party. It works for pretty much anything except with guns. The National Rifle Association is not suggesting that people use rifles to stand and fight, of course. They despise violence—unless it is met with more effective violence, which is why they insist that the President stop being a hypocrite and put armed guards in schools.

House Republicans mull shutdown

By Dan Brooks in Politics versus Government January 15, 2013 3 Comments

“So the priest says—hang on. If you want to hear the rest of the joke, give me ten dollars right now.”

According to a Politico report that has scared hell out of the nation and briefly thrown me into agreement with Ross Douthat, a substantial number of House Republicans are considering refusing to raise the debt ceiling. The plan is to use the threat of default and/or federal shutdown to force Obama to agree to spending cuts—cuts he has repeatedly refused to make. That part of the story should be eerily familiar from last year, when maneuvering over the debt ceiling ended in the downgrade of the credit of the United States. Everyone agreed that was a disaster, both for the union and for the Republican caucus. This year, though, will be totally different. Alarming quote after the jump.