httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCv8wClAC38

As you can probably judge by the lateness of the hour, Combat! blog is behind in its paying work today and has no time for astute cultural analysis, much less what we usually do. Instead, enjoy this video clip from the “Art of Gracie Jiu Jitsu” series, which explains the then-nascent discipline of Brazilian jiu jitsu to the world via grainy video clips of Royler beating hell out of karate instructors. Even if you’re not a jiu jitsu fan—and I frankly find that position baffling—you can appreciate the serene, nature-documentary narration as Royler mercilessly hits this poor man in the ear to get him to roll over. Enthusiasts will enjoy the entire series, which also contains perhaps the most humiliating refutation of hapkido ever caught on tape. Protect your neck and I’ll see you tomorrow.

One can only imagine what life is like for an engineer, or a commercial fisherman, or some other person whose survival is predicated on their assessments of things actually corresponding to the world around them. The real racket is commentary, where ontology goes out the window in favor of epistemology, and once epistemology gets comfortable it stops wearing pants and starts leaving Mountain Dew bottles full of chew spit on the coffee table, while simultaneously claiming that it cleans up “all the time.” As in fashion, the trick in commentary is not to be right so much as memorable. Even being publicly proven wrong is a moment of career advancement, providing at worst an occasion for further commentary. Frankly, we at Combat! blog are a little jealous that we’re not getting a bigger piece of the pie. We’re wrong all the time, but nobody ever pillories us for our specious claims, much less our constant use of the word “rimjob.” One suspects that we simply need a bigger megaphone.

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Combat! blog woke up in its brand-new apartment at 5:30 this morning and dove immediately to the airport, where it was beset by all the sights, sounds and smells of the modern age. In addition to getting an extremely detailed explanation of how drip coffee is made from the man in line next to me at the airport coffee place, I also witnessed a woman who had purchased two seats from Denver to Des Moines and found herself unable to fit into them unsuccessfully argue for a free third seat, at that time occupied by a man trying valiantly to read his book. Half an hour later, she was upgraded to two business-class seats. Anyway, that’s A) why my flight was delayed and B) why Combat! blog does not really exist today, since I am sweating sack in Des Moines and still under two deadlines. We’ll be back tomorrow, bright-eyed and American obesity epidemic-oriented. In the meantime, have you been keeping up with Tea Party Jesus?