This week in being responsible

By Dan Brooks in Uncategorized 1 Comment

Because of a series of free choices I made last night, which just happened to be the midpoint between my thirty-third and thirty-fourth birthdays, Combat! blog was Combat? Blearrgh! all day. Do you sometimes miss work because of drinking? I do apparently, and I think we can all agree that my new life as an alcoholic will be even more exciting than what has come thus far. The only hitch is that I never want to drink alcohol again, but I’m sure that will change as I get alone-er. Good news on that front: I did get the number of a young lady who had accumulated so many drink tickets that as I was leaving she won a snowboard in a raffle, and as soon as I learn her name, we will be in business. While I regain homeostasis, how about you read this fascinating article about how you kill a religion? You say you wouldn’t, but what are you gonna do when religion kicks down your door in the middle of the night and starts menacing your family? If you’re picturing Southern Baptist in this hypothetical, it’s because you’re a racist. I know—I’m an alcoholic.

Clarence Thomas goes 5 years without speaking during arguments

By Dan Brooks in Uncategorized 3 Comments

Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, his wife Virginia, and someone with a neck

Come Tuesday, Clarence Thomas will have passed five years on the Supreme Court without asking a question or offering his opinion during oral arguments. That’s unusual. According to the New York Times, “in the 20 years that ended in 2008,* the justices asked an average of 133 questions per hourlong argument, up from about 100 in the 15 years before that.” Antonin Scalia has been known to interrupt petitioners to read aloud from Garfield. Yet Thomas, described as “gregarious” in his personal life, has not spoken from the bench—except to read prepared statements of majority opinion—since 2006. In addition to pointing out the fundamental inadequacies of the nickname “Silent Clar,” such long reticence begs a question: why?

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Montana legislature just a damn church social now

By Dan Brooks in representative democracy 3 Comments

I don’t know if you heard about this, but there there was kind of a conservative resurgence in the last election. Normally, Montana is resistant to such broad national trends—see also: real estate collapse, Trader Joe’s, prohibition against sweatpants in public—and in this case, the notion of the median political position moving to the right seemed almost statistically impossible. Those of us living in Missoula tend to forget, but Montana is one of the redder states in the union, as a quick trip down (and, abruptly, further down) any public roadway will indicate. Yet, like Frankenstein slowing down as he gets older, the Montana legislature has managed to become even more conservative. The other week, we talked about their plan to adopt the most restrictive voter registration requirements in the country. On Friday, they’ll vote on repealing the so-called Missoula Ordinance, which prohibits discrimination in housing and public accommodations on the basis of sexual orientation, and on adopting a law that would ban similar nondiscrimination ordinances across the state. Somewhere in that busy agenda of protecting freedom by outlawing various actions, they’ve also found time for House Bill 438, a law that would require couples to complete ten hours of marriage counseling before they can get divorced.

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Happy Contrarian’s Day

By Dan Brooks in Public Discourse 1 Comment

This Darwinian valentine courtesy of defectiveyeti.com.

It’s Valentine’s Day, which means I will be taking even more opportunity than usual to discomfit others with jokes about how I will inevitably die alone. The best part about feeling incapable of normal social interaction is that it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy; you keep telling people that you don’t know how to get along, and eventually they are forced to concede your point. The power of such contrarianism is nowhen more evident than on Valentine’s Day, when smug assholes like myself are moved to observe that A) the holiday and probably the very concept of romantic love are blatant constructions of a society bent on making us buy stuff and/or have children who will subsequently buy stuff, and also B) we do not have a date this year. There are so many of us, and yet we are all alone. Contrarianism is a trap, and I submit as proof this amazing letter to the editors of The Economist refuting it.

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Friday links! Fundamental compatibilities edition

By Dan Brooks in Uncategorized 3 Comments

Contemporary interpersonal organization puts me in a difficult position: I hate myself, and yet I want to associate primarily with people who are like me. We all want to expand our social circles, if for no other reason than to increase our access to donor kidneys, but you can’t go around with just anyone. Most people are assholes, and going to a party or joining some community organization is like reaching into a bag containing one licorice whip and 23 garter snakes. Sure, you keep putting things in your mouth, but you also keep wishing you hadn’t.* And yet the occasional gem leads us to persist, even though most people are compatible like a goldfish and a hairbrush. But there’s an upside: you usually find out pretty quick. This week’s link roundup features indicators of compatibility from the subtle to the overt to the viscerally repulsive. It’s a glimpse of the stage machinery behind getting along, or at least a reminder of how bafflingly unrelatable so many people are. It’s Friday, the weekend is upon us, and the world is full of strangers eager to make and then alienate our acquaintance. Welcome, new friends, and hello strangely familiar assholes.

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