First they came for James Franco, and I said nothing, because fuck him


James Franco waits for a mediocre film to succeed wildly, again.

Remember when Kim Jong Un saved America from another self-indulgent James Franco project? That was cool, but he shouldn’t have used terrorism to do it. Of course, this conflict between a pampered manchild exploiting a brainwashed peasantry and Kim Jong Un didn’t require any actual terrorism. The Guardians of Peace needed only to invoke the name of September 11th, and the American film industry—theoretically unafraid to challenge any taboo in the name of art/money—couldn’t take a $44 million loss fast enough. When Pyongyang threatened to “turn Washington into a lake of fire,” we all laughed. Let an anonymous email imply that terrorism might happen, though, and America’s last viable industry becomes a quivering mass. Let’s admit it: the terrorists won. That’s my bitter contention in this week’s column for the Missoula Independent, which is more fun than it sounds—I swear. It’s at least better than Your Highness.

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  1. Woah woah woah, what’s wrong with James Franco? He’s obviously super bright, and haven’t found his work to be any more self-indulgent than yours.

  2. Ouch. Probably there is nothing wrong with James Franco, but I find him unlikable. Partly that is hearing stories from people who have worked with him, but mostly it’s that his films haven’t grabbed me. What’s the best Franco movie? The one I liked best was This Is the End, which I consider an interesting failure. I suspect, though, that the line between pro- and anti-Franco falls between those who watched Freaks and Geeks and those who didn’t. I missed it.

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