One-star Yelp reviews of Yellow Taxi

There are two taxi companies in Missoula: Yellow Taxi, which currently enjoys a one-star rating on Yelp, and Green Taxi, which may or may not have purchased a second car. If you call a cab in this town, the wait is usually between one and two hours. I’ve been utterly stiffed at 6am by Green Taxi and missed a flight as a result. Also on my way to the airport, I’ve been picked up an hour late by Yellow Taxi and then told we were going to stop for a second fare. The dispatcher of the same company once told me to fuck myself when I called to ask where my cab was.

These two enterprises have been protected from the invisible hand of a free market by the Public Services Commission, which has used its regulatory authority to quash any competing cab companies in Missoula for the last several years. But this cabal of incompetents can suck it from now on, because Uber is coming to Missoula. The Montana legislature approved the transportation network carrier’s operation in the state, and because Uber is technically not a cab company, the PSC cannot regulate it out of business. Soon, the owners of Yellow and Green Taxi will be starving in the streets, their children reduced to performing janitorial work at the customer-service call centers of Chinese pornography companies. Or they’ll offer better, more reliable service. Either would be okay with me, as I explain in this week’s column for the Missoula Independent. We’ll be back tomorrow with Friday links.

There is no Combat! blog today, because vertigo came back. Maybe it’s just a brief dip in the upward-tending line of my recovery, and everything will be fine. Or maybe not. When you think about it, there’s no reason I shouldn’t just sicken and die. The important thing is that my doctor can’t see me until July 14, and no other doctor in Missoula covered by my insurance is taking new patients before September. So whatever happens will happen, and I will get better or not, and in the meantime I will keep not writing and not doing the fun things I planned to do this summer. I suppose I will keep throwing up, too, and continue to lose weight. There’s no reason it should ever stop, really. There’s no reason any doctor should be able figure out what is wrong with me, and there’s no reason what is wrong with me can’t just be everything—getting sick over and over for no particular reason but coincidence. There’s no reason I should be well. There’s no reason I should even be able to stand up. There’s no reason anything should get better, because fuck me, right? If you need me, I’ll be in my apartment, where it’s been record-hot all week for no reason at all, too. Don’t read this post aloud at my funeral.

Rep. Ryan Zinke in the photograph he provided to Breitbart News

Did you know Rep. Ryan Zinke (R–MT) used to be a Navy SEAL? The picture of himself he provided to Breitbart News appears to be about 15 years old, but it still lends credibility to his assertion that President Obama cannot be trusted to negotiate the Trans Pacific Partnership in America’s interest. Sure, that’s kind of an irresponsible statement for a freshman congressman to make. He’s basically describing a nightmare scenario. To whom is the President loyal if not the United States? Shouldn’t we launch some kind of investigation into his plans to use the TPP to benefit foreign parties? Normally I would greet such claims with skepticism, but Zinke is a war hero. He wouldn’t impugn the patriotism of the commander in chief unless he had a really good reason. Either that, or he’s not great at saying what he means. You can read my speculation on the subject in this week’s column for the Missoula Independent, which I wrote back when my eyes stayed level to the horizon without my even thinking about it. Now if I turn my head a certain way, I fall over. We’ll be back tomorrow, fair and imbalanced.

Hey, guess. I write you from a fixed point on the periphery of my vision in an objectively stable room that, according to my perspective, turns persistently. My throat is very sore on one side and my corresponding ear hurts, and I assume that it was I am so dizzy. I cannot sit up long enough to type a real blog today, as you probably gathered. I am also tired of being sick all the time. High hopes for wellness tomorrow, though, when we return with an Indy column and maybe a bonus blog for missing today.