Friday links! Awesome power of logic edition

Deductive reasoning isn’t just a tool for curing polio and making accurate models of the solar system; it’s also a great way to alienate yourself from like half the population. One can only imagine the joy of the first caveman who combined two truthful propositions to synthesize a third, and the disappointment/rock impact he felt when he tried to explain it to somebody else. The problem with logic is that it works best on those people who are most likely to arrive at valid conclusions themselves. Its effectiveness diminishes as you deal with unprincipled or prejudiced people—sorry, “common sense” people—and drops to near zero when you get to people who prefer standing outside and yelling stuff. Basically, logic convinces least where you need it most, like if Raid killed bugs in direct proportion to their intelligence. This week’s link roundup starts out with some sweet victories for logic, then watches logic return to its role as depressingly aging gatekeeper. It’s also got Glenn Beck telling us which major religion the Antichrist will probably belong to so, you know, look out for that.

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Friday links: Here is your American culture edition

Google Image Search result: "American culture."

I don’t know if my brain performs some sort of maintenance task* on Thursday nights or what, but every once in a while, I wake up on Friday morning and find American culture extremely weird and alienating. Today is one such Friday. How did we arrive at our peculiar combination of performative Christian morality and relentless sexualization of women, men, children and sometimes objects? Even if you can explain that, how did we get from there to Tracy Morgan? The invention of endstopped rhyming language patterns seems vertiginously contingent enough, without even mentioning murder-themed clown rap. Virtually every particular of society and discourse is arbitrary and bizarre when you look at it closely, yet our immersion in it makes it all seem so necessary. It’s the existential dilemma writ large: radical contingency, radical interrelationship, radical nutjobs yelling at you on television. Today is Friday, nothing makes any goddamn sense at all, and it’s all super important. Here is your American culture.

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Friday links! Multimedia edition

At the risk of using my blog to tell people about other people who looked at my work, thereby causing the entire narcissism manifold to collapse upon itself, our stupid zombie video has more than a quarter million views since Monday. That officially makes it the most popular thing I have ever written.* It also makes me think this internet video thing might be catching on. As a producer and consumer of web bullshit, I tend inordinately toward text for one simple reason: working in a medium that 98% of the population considers important only to schoolchildren obviates the question of whether you’re doing a good job. You can write anything after the first 200 words, because by then the only people reading are those who identify with the act of reading itself and therefore like whatever. It’s like dating a drama girl. Anywhom, this week’s link roundup is chock full of videos, self-portraits, candid recordings and other proof that words are lame. It also contains the word “faggot” like fifty times. It’s Friday!

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Friday links! Terror of rejection edition

Today’s link roundup is not so much organized around a central theme as compiled under a certain mindset: abject social terror. In what seemed like a brilliant tactical move for the thirty seconds that it took me to execute it, I agreed to participate in a bachelor auction this evening. Now I will finally get a chance to live out my lifelong dream of seeing just how little people want to go on a date with me expressed as a monetary value, from a stage. Needless to say, I will be drunk. Until then, I will think about it, and any typos or unsubstantiated allegations that appear in today’s blog are likely the result of me experiencing an anxiety blackout and regressing to childhood. I’m kidding, of course. As a functioning adult with a job and an apartment, I go on tons of dates all the time and no longer fear rejection on the individual or community level. I also invented hockey.

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Friday links! Willing to do what others will not edition

Julius Caesar wrote that out of any 100 soldiers, ten will be utterly fearless, ten will panic and become useless at the first clash of swords, and 80 could go either way. Success in battle, says Caesar, depends on those 80 percent. At the risk of both paraphrasing one of history’s greatest generals and underestimating the value of numbers, victory belongs to those willing to do what others will not. This week’s link roundup is chock full of people who have not necessarily succeeded because of the merit of what they are doing. In many cases, they’re getting what they want in spite of that. But they’re doing things that their competitors won’t try, or that our various forebears and lawgivers just sort of assumed nobody would do. They’re the bold pioneers in the field of human decency, striking out into frontier lands of douche, and they are handsomely rewarded. The rest of us can chastise them for it, sure, but our disapproval will be ever undermined by our jealousy. Sort of.

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