Now is the time for…whatever this is

By Dan Brooks in Campaign Advertisements 10 Comments

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qhm-22Q0PuM

Props to Pete Jones for the link to this video, which as near as I can tell is not fake. I admit I was difficult to convince at first. It seems literally incredible that one campaign could make so many bizarre choices in 56 seconds, not the least of which is pointing a video camera at Mark Block. He looks like a guy who runs the Wisconsin chapter of Americans for Prosperity, possibly because he used to run the Wisconsin chapter of Americans for Prosperity. Block is Herman Cain’s campaign manager, so it would almost make sense to put him in this video, if he did not so closely resemble the dude your mom dated right after she heard your dad was dating someone. Block’s questionable charisma is completely erased at the :40 mark, though, when he takes a long, defiant drag from his cigarette. And…music!

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Rick Perry releases Armageddon 2: Antichrist

By Dan Brooks in Campaign Advertisements 6 Comments

Kaboom! Mitt Rombama has a psychic episode.

A few weeks ago we discussed the terrifyingly cinematic campaign commercial in which Rick Perry teaches a broken America to make jet fighters again. That was back when he was the front runner and logically impelled to demonize the President. Now that the American people have gotten to know him, Perry is trailing fellow suit-mounted jawline Mitt Romney. (Ed.: Who? Who?) The two men couldn’t be more different: one is the millionaire son of a former governor, and the other became a millionaire while he was governor. Also, one of them is basically Barack Obama. In order to make clear which, Perry has produced this 59-second biopic. Props to Micky for the link, and video after the jump.

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Rick Perry for President of exploding Superamerica

By Dan Brooks in Contemporary Media 8 Comments

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EL5Atp_vF0

First of all “Superamerica” is totally in the OS X spellcheck dictionary, which makes me think it’s existed all along. Wouldn’t you rather live there than in the peeling, dilapidated husk of America depicted in this Rick Perry advertisement? The Perry campaign released this spot—titled “Rick Perry: Proven Leadership”—on Tuesday, and it joins a long line of Republican ads that portray the United States as, well, Detroit. Even the parking meters have garbage bags over them in Wrecked Now America, a place where everyone voted for Barack Obama just before vanishing. The only human being that appears in the first 30 seconds of this video is the President, plus a couple of TV anchors shown on pictures of TVs. The rest of the country is empty, except for that sound which has become so commonplace now that we hardly notice it: air raid sirens.

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God. Dammit.

By Dan Brooks in Contemporary Media 12 Comments

Representative Anthony Weiner, in jacket, shirt, tie and socks, waits for Ronnie to set up the shot.

Hey—what do Brett Favre, Kanye West and Anthony Weiner have in common? They’ve all distracted us from critical problems in American politics and culture. Also, they’ve all conducted peer-reviewed experiments proving that becoming rich and/or famous does not make your penis larger. It also doesn’t make you smarter. Yesterday, Representative Anthony Weiner (D–NY) announced that yes, it was a picture of his boxer-briefed semi sent to that woman on Twitter, and yes, he sent it. That previous story about how a hacker got into his Twitter and sent a mysterious picture of someone’s dick to one pretty girl from his followers list? Yeah, saying that was a bad idea. Come to think of it, that was probably the second worst idea Anthony Weiner had all month.

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