You think it’s his hand that makes this GIF funny, but it’s his facial expressions. Does Rick Santorum understand the awesome contributions he has made to internet culture? Letting us re-coin his name would have been plenty. But last night, he give us a meme we can use to belittle one another on MMA discussion boards for centuries. Richard John “Rick” Santorum walks the history of online discourse a god, remaking the terrain as he goes, yet he thinks he should settle for being president. Yeah, bro, our society needs your leadership skills. Today is Friday, and each of us contributes according to abilities he may not know he has. Won’t you take according to your needs with me?
Behold the Terry Casual Elastic Suspender, a product that you can purchase via Amazon and have shipped to your home, thus allowing you a consumer experience basically unprecedented in human history. Thanks to the internet, we can own things that we have never seen. It’s great for people like me who find shopping a scary, alienating experience, but it introduces problems you don’t get with conventional retail. For example: what are these suspenders like? I know from the picture that they can be easily arranged in the shape of a traffic-sign man, but otherwise I have little understanding of their qualities. Fortunately, I have this five-star buyer review to guide me:
BEST FASTENER, SEWN INTERSECTION: I tried out 3 types of suspenders, and this model had the most reliable fastener clips, meaning they slipped off my waistband least often. Also, I liked the unfancy intersection of the 2 straps, which were sewn together simply. Other types I tried had either a clip that can slip, or a bit of gratuitous leather there.
I, too, like an unfancy intersection. And those fasteners sound great—especially if you don’t read any of the reviews that follow.