Authenticity Watch: Drip coffee

By Dan Brooks in advertising 1 Comment

The snooty waiter waits.

The best part of dogsitting Stringer is watching TV, and the best part of watching TV is seeing commercials. Neither of those statements is what rhetoricians call “true,” but my ad consumption is way up over the last week anyway, probably as a consequence of my inability to work the DVR. Don’t cry for me, because finally I can access the fundamental function of advertising: telling me what’s real. If, like me, you were 14 years old when “alternative” became the most popular genre of music, you know that large portions of American culture are fake. The mainstream is a powerful if misguided force, and it is up to us rugged individuals to discern what is authentic from trends, pretensions, corporate drones and simulacra. And we have nothing to go by besides A) our visceral intuition of the sublime and B) Maxwell House commercials. Video after the jump.

Continue reading

Everything will be permitted once the new Axe comes out

By Dan Brooks in advertising 5 Comments

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7NN0-AWiv4k

Pete Jones sent me this commercial for the new Axe odor replacement product, which will apparently render meaningless all previously articulated principles of morality and real estate. Those are three jewelry stores next door to one another in the opening shot, and they’re not in the diamond district. They appear to be on Lafayette Street, but that’s not important. What’s important is that everyone understand the premise of this deodorant ad: jewelry store robbery, apparently involving machine gun fire. You can hear it for the first two seconds of the video, followed immediately by our robber emerging from a store that is definitely in the diamond district now. Since the glass windows are unbroken and there’s no blood on him, I can only assume that all six of his shots hit center mass.

Continue reading

Rick Perry releases final Iowa ad

By Dan Brooks in Republican Candidates 7 Comments

If the last extant copy of this picture were inside a burning orphanage, I hope I would save an orphan.

You can tell a lot about a person by what they think will make you happy. If every time you fight with your husband he tries to give you a pretty necklace, yours may not be the relationship of mutual respect you want it to be. We’ve all known people whose attempts to please us are less nuanced than they think. Perhaps Rick Perry is no such cynical manipulator. Maybe he’s more like the aunt who took you to a Cubs game once and now sends you jerseys and Harry Caray biographies every Christmas. Whatever he’s up to, Perry decided this week that abortions shouldn’t be legal even in cases of rape or incest, then walked back his position to theoretically allow them when a woman’s life was at risk. He also produced his last campaign advertisement before the Iowa caucuses. Video after the jump.

Continue reading

Rick Perry not afraid to admit he is a Christian

By Dan Brooks in Republican Candidates 13 Comments

"Whole country's so bolloxed up I can't even enjoy this uncritically."

The Iowa caucuses are less than a month away, which means it’s time for candidates for the Republican nomination to demonstrate whatever bona fides might appeal to a rural, right-leaning state that also loves education and farm subsidies. It’s kind of tricky, to tell you the truth, but Iowa conforms to the template of contemporary conservatism in at least one way: church people. The state is bursting at the Crocs with evangelical Christians. That’s good news for Rick Perry, whose professed religion is the one part of his campaign he has not yet screwed up. If Newt Gingrich somehow makes himself unlikable between now and then, a victory in Iowa might breathe new life into Perry’s bid. If only he could find some completely safe issue that appeals to religious voters but doesn’t require him to remember anything about policy or events. If only. Video after the jump.

Continue reading

Regarding shame

By Dan Brooks in Republican Candidates 11 Comments

As a lazy, dishonest person, I appreciate the value of shame. Take this blog: were it not for the literally several of you who expect a post each weekday, I would probably wake up early and excuse myself from writing almost every morning. Fortunately, I find time in the day to do that anyway, but my point is that shame is a powerful motivator—for me, at least, and I suspect for a lot of other people, too. One of the aspects of conservative orthodoxy I actually agree with is that our contemporary culture exerts dangerously low amounts of shame. I totally disagree with conservatives about where that shame should be placed; we still exert way too much shame on gay people and immigrants, for example. That’s valuable shame that could be more effectively directed elsewhere. Maybe, as Thomas Edsall suggests in the Times, we could redirect our shame at people who make obviously false and/or misleading statements to the general public. Earlier generations called such statements lies.

Continue reading